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August 1, 2013

the Sunny Side of Life, Part II

I teach my audiences and clients 5 Rays to help them rise above their circumstances and live life on the sunny side!

  • Entitlement Expectations
  • SPF
  • Labeling
  • Mindful Talk
  • Celebration

Hopefully your July was happier after reading last month’s news letter on Entitlement Expectations and SPF!  This month we are going to continue on with Labeling and Mindful Talk!

Ray 3 – Labeling

Words that label have tremendous impact on our attitude and how we feel. We have to be careful about how we label the relationships, events and outcomes we have in life. If we label something as bad it becomes our belief and we manifest feelings and emotions that support the label of bad. I find using the word interesting instead of bad takes away the negative power.

Our beliefs of positive and negative are based on our past experiences. If we do something and we have what we believe to be a negative outcome we will label it as negative. Yet we may have an entirely different outcome if we attempted to do it again. For example, I went on a hot air balloon ride over Napa Valley for my 50th birthday (just a few short years ago). It was serene and wonderful. I am even afraid of heights and I would do it again in a heartbeat. I would label it as a very positive experience. However the following day the winds came up unexpectedly and the balloons had a difficult time landing. I may have labeled it as negative had I gone on that day…and most likely would never consider going again. The great news is we can change our belief from negative to positive when we add new experiences that our positive.

Truthfully, how can we label something as good or bad if we don’t know the end? None of us have a crystal ball. So how do we really know if something is good or bad? There have been many things in my life that at the time seemed interesting that actually turned out generating a very positive outcome. Haven’t we all thought or said this is going to be bad at one time or another and yet it turned out to be one the best things to happen to us. 


 

Ray 4 – Mindful Talk

It is imperative that we are mindful of our self talk if we want to live life on the sunny side!  The majority of self talk takes place so quickly and automatically that we don’t even notice we are doing it. Even if you don’t really listen to your chatter, your subconscious mind is listening.  The subconscious mind just accepts everything you tell it, and responds accordingly. 

 Some examples of negative self-talk are:

  • Worry – Fear of what if ???
  • Perfectionism – Not good enough or should haves!
  • Self-Criticism – Compares you to others, with you being the loser.
  • Self-Doubt – Lack of confidence that you can do or achieve your dreams.
  • Being a Victim – You have no control over your circumstances, and you and your life are bad luck!

The awesome news is we can hard wire our brain to start thinking more positively!  When we have mindful talk and actively choose where to focus our thoughts and repeatedly apply it to a wholesome and constructive thought we eliminate the negative deceptive self talk!

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